Featured Single
Q4 Roadmap
v4.0.0Subject to change pending board approval.
Vesting Schedule
SHIPPEDLive on all platforms
100%
Thought Leader
IN PROGRESS30%
There's an Agent for That
BACKLOG5%
The Cap Table
Fully diluted ownership
Your position is non-voting. Congratulations.
¹ Vesting subject to continued employment, good behavior, and founder's mood.
Dilution History
Your journey to irrelevance.
You were employee #3. They called you 'family.'
New investors. New cap table. Same ping pong table.
Anti-dilution provisions. For them, not you.
You were told this was 'a great outcome for everyone.'
Congratulations on your continued participation.
Current Valuation
To you
$0.00
Unrealized. Unliquidated. Unfazed.
Your Vesting Progress
Keep grinding.
Month 3 of 48
You must reach Month 12 before any shares vest. You are not there yet.
You're 6.25% of the way to owning something you still can't sell.
Comparable Companies
For reference purposes only.
Acqui-hired. Options underwater.
Liquidation preference triggered. Twice.
Still 'processing' after 3 years.
Recapitalization event. You weren't invited.
Projected.
Past performance is not indicative of future results. Your results will be worse.
Get on the cap table.
Updates, releases, and equity memos. No dilution.
Bookings, Press & Media
For show bookings, press inquiries, sync licensing, and media appearances:
[email protected]